Trust and confidence go hand in hand

Times have changed. Once, being a professional automatically meant you were trusted and respected. But now, things are different. Trust in professionals has been shaken. Nowadays, clients often doubt professionals' intentions and expertise. They want more proof of quality work and reliability, not just talk about prices. This means professionals need to work harder to earn trust, show their skills, and provide more access to clients.

To break free from limitations, aim to be a "trusted advisor." This means building strong relationships with each client. As the relationship grows, clients will involve you in more business matters. You'll go from being an expert to a trusted partner with specialized knowledge. It's a step-by-step process, but once you're a trusted advisor, clients will confide in you about everything, both personal and professional.

When you're the first person your clients turn to during tough times, it shows they trust you. By addressing a wide range of issues and building strong personal connections, you earn their respect. Once you prove you can handle their problems and understand them well, they'll value your advice and seek it out.

The Story of David Falk and Michael Jordan

Back in 1977, David Falk scored big when he helped Michael Jordan seal a sweet $2.5 million deal with Nike. As Jordan's career soared, Falk kept hustling, bagging more endorsement deals for him. Falk's agency later got sold for a whopping $100 million, but guess what? He still gets a cool 4% cut from Jordan's earnings. How? Well, Falk didn't just do the talking; he listened too. He knew what Jordan wanted, even his thoughts on fees. Sometimes, Falk skipped his cut without asking Jordan, just because he knew Jordan wouldn't dig the bill. And you know what's cool? Falk and Jordan are still tight today.

Trusted advisors create strong bonds with their clients by focusing on their needs above all else. They believe that doing what's right pays off in the long run, even if a project doesn't go as planned. Putting the client relationship first means they're willing to invest time and effort, even when there's no immediate profit. Successful advisors prioritize their clients and tailor their approach to each individual. They're always looking for new ways to help, identify problems, and find solutions.

Believe in me

Professional advisors often see themselves as trustworthy, but not everyone they encounter shares that belief. Building trust, especially with strangers, is tough but essential.

To gain someone's trust, you need to show them why they should trust you. It's a give-and-take situation. For example, a person seeking legal advice on probate met with several attorneys. They weren't impressed because these lawyers talked about their firms without bothering to ask what the client needed.

Build Trust in Legal Matters

A lawyer asked his client about their knowledge of probate. The client admitted knowing very little. In response, the attorney sent the client free information via mail, detailing which agencies to contact and what steps to take. The lawyer also included their contact information. This simple exchange helped establish trust, leading to the lawyer gaining a new client.

Trust has several key features: it develops over time, it involves both rational thinking and emotions, it relies on mutual understanding, it requires taking some personal risk, and it entails a long-term commitment. Trust is built between people, not institutions.

Offer clear advice 

Professional advisors should blend technical expertise with emotional intelligence. Start by being genuinely helpful. If there's bad news to deliver about a client's mistake, approach it tactfully. Avoid dumping a laundry list of errors on them right away. Instead, consider how they'll take the news, factoring in company dynamics, personal interpretations, and current emotions.

This process involves using gentle language and avoiding strong statements. Instead of saying, "Here's the problem and the solution," try asking, "What problems are we dealing with?" When suggesting solutions, frame them as examples of what others have done to tackle similar issues. The best way forward is to ask lots of questions, like the Socratic teaching method. This might take time and be a bit frustrating, but it's crucial when giving advice. Since each client and situation is different, you need to use different approaches. Recognize each client's uniqueness and how they like to communicate. To help clients make the right decisions, follow these steps:

• Offer clients multiple options.
•  Educate them about each option and its consequences.
• Make a recommendation.
• Provide a framework for informed decision-making.

Equal but segregated.

Building a business relationship is a lot like building a personal one. You need to be sympathetic, understanding, available, supportive, and respectful. Get to know each client's likes and dislikes, and treat them like they're special. For instance, one professional firm wanted to impress Wells Fargo bank, so they presented their pitch in a leather saddlebag, which reminded Wells Fargo of its American pioneer roots. Show potential clients how your skills can help them and prove that you get what they need. Listen to their problems, figure out what makes them unique, and offer your help.

Trusted advisors earn the right to advise by understanding their clients' businesses and decoding their words. For example, when a client says, "I’m not sure that will work," it could mean they think the idea might fail, or it's too political, or it needs tweaking, or it's just not going to happen. As you get to know your clients, you'll learn when they're asking for advice and when they're not. Both are important. But don't think you can fix everything.

Advisors should clearly express their ideas. If you're struggling to gather information from your team, speak up about it. And if you find yourself stuck, don't be afraid to admit it and ask for assistance. Trying to seem like you know everything can backfire and make you look foolish. The key is to be willing to seek help rather than demanding it. This small difference can have a big impact.

Maintain concentration

Trusted advisors focus on their clients, which can be tougher than just being good at technical stuff. Sometimes, instead of listening, they're too busy thinking about what to say next. This happens because they're worried about looking dumb or not understanding the problem. But this can make things more complicated because clients want their advisors to get what's going on both technically and emotionally. So, it's important to practice "empathic listening" to figure out what clients know and what they don't. If you're working with other professionals who also help your clients, it's better to work together than to focus on differences. Being too exclusive about your professionalism can get in the way of helping clients. To help them, you need to be able to collaborate well with their other advisors.

Do you approve of me?

Advisors usually have stronger relationships with clients they like. However, one study found that professionals only like their clients around 20% to 30% of the time. The rest of the time, they just focus on business, without getting emotionally attached. Sometimes the advisor likes the client, but the feeling isn't mutual, so they don't become friends. This marks the line between doing business and personal connection, the difference between caring about the client and simply providing a service.

To be trusted, advisors must be credible, reliable, properly motivated, and sometimes show emotion. Credibility includes technical expertise, presentation skills, and personal experience. Trusted advisors are accurate and thorough, able to foresee needs and offer insights into future scenarios. To show credibility, be honest about what you know, introduce clients to each other for shared experiences, display your qualifications, add emotion to presentations, and avoid exaggeration.

Reliability means matching promises with performance over time. To gain clients' trust, follow a five-step process:

1-"Engaging" - Give each client and potential customer personal attention. Offer customized solutions. Connect with clients on a personal level, discussing their business challenges promptly and in a relevant way. Learn as much as you can about new prospects. Look for chances to chat about shared interests. It's important to talk about more than just facts; otherwise, you might get stuck being seen as a technician rather than an advisor.

2-"Listening" - Sometimes, the most crucial part of being an advisor is listening, understanding, and actively participating. Listening isn't just sitting quietly; it's an active process. When setting up a meeting, create an agenda. This helps focus the discussion, make decisions, and spur action. When clients know the agenda, they feel more involved and invested in the meeting's outcome.

3-"Framing" - When advisors clearly explain their clients’ problems, they're halfway to finding a solution. Framing a problem can be tough, but when done right, it's super rewarding. You can frame problems in two ways: rational or emotional. Rational framing breaks down a problem into its parts, giving a new perspective. Emotional framing digs into personal feelings tied to a decision, which can feel uncomfortable but helps bring out things left unsaid.

4-"Alternate reality" - Describing a possible new reality opens up clients' minds to new ways of doing things; it can spark creativity or challenge how things are done now. Envisioning, which is key to problem-solving, sets the stage for future actions.

5-"Commitment"- "Once you've outlined the problem, crafted a vision, and decided on a plan, it's crucial to explain the practical steps to your client. This includes highlighting potential challenges and obstacles to prepare them for what's ahead. By doing this, you connect the strategy to its real-world execution. Manage your client's expectations by clearly outlining the actions you'll take and what they need to do. Providing specific details helps prevent misunderstandings and keeps everyone on the same page."

Execute the plan effectively.

Why do many qualified professionals struggle to gain trust? Some say it's because they see it as risky or outside their training. Others worry it might invade personal boundaries or mix up advice with counseling or coaching. But the truth is, the more you know someone, the more they're likely to trust you.

Advisors often jump into action before earning the full trust of their clients, which is a big mistake. They tend to focus too much on themselves, thinking they're just technical experts, and sometimes offer solutions prematurely. But it's crucial to avoid rushing into selling solutions, even if clients tend to judge advisors based on their expertise. Some clients want to tackle bigger issues with advisors they trust.

When high-level executives make important decisions, it's not just about logic—it's also about emotions. Advisors who are afraid of making mistakes might end up not taking the right actions. This kind of mistake, often caused by arrogance or fear, is even worse than an honest error.