About this Author
Humble The Poet, whose real name is Kanwer Singh, is a Canadian artist, rapper, and social media influencer. Previously an elementary school teacher, he has authored best-selling books like “Unlearn” and “Things No One Else Can Teach Us”. His work has been highlighted in major publications such as the New York Times, BuzzFeed, Vogue, Rolling Stone, and the Huffington Post. Known for his unique perspective, Singh blends personal insights with motivational themes in his creative endeavors.
2022
Self-Help
Conclusion
6 Key Points
Conclusion
Love is not a destination but a continuous journey. It requires effort, honesty, and self-love. Accept imperfections in yourself and others. cherish both joy and pain. To experience more love, give more. Use your heart, scars, and all, to love fully.
Abstract
In “How to be Love(d)”, Humble The Poet (Kanwer Singh) challenges the idea that love is a destination, urging readers to view it as an ongoing journey. He emphasizes the difference between superficial “Small L” love and profound “Big L” love, which requires effort, communication, and self-honesty. By focusing on self-love and accepting imperfections, individuals can give and receive more love. Pain and conflict are inherent parts of love, but facing them honestly deepens the connection. Ultimately, love isn’t about perfection or ego; it’s about welcoming vulnerability, progress, and continuous growth in relationships with ourselves and others.
Key Points
Summary
Love isn’t a noun; it’s an action
In books and movies, love often seems like the end goal—the girl gets the boy, the family reunites, and friends get married. These are happy endings, but they leave people wondering, "What now?" Love is seen as the ultimate destination. But in real life, we also treat love like a finish line, believing that once we reach certain milestones—like landing our dream job or finding a partner—we'll finally be happy. Psychologist Robert Holden calls this “destination addiction.”
However, love, like happiness, isn’t a destination; it’s a journey. When you start actively practicing love instead of just chasing it, you'll see it’s all around you. There’s “Small L” love for things like ice cream or football games, and then there’s “Big L” love for deeper connections, like the love for a grandparent’s wrinkly hands or a partner’s laugh. Small L love is about quick pleasure and is easy to get. Big L love is more profound, offering deep, life-changing satisfaction and connection.
Big L love is what you should focus on in relationships with yourself, family, and partners. It’s not a
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